Doug is my best friend and he says I’m his only friend. Somewhat inaccurate but I like to humor him. Doug and I have known each other for years and our friendship has evolved and the reality is there is no one else we’d rather be with. We laugh, tease and aren’t afraid to call each other out. But we also encourage and push and help the other realize their full potential. We do our best to co-parent and support each other’s children, even if it’s just showing up at games (and well that’s a story for another day.)
My hopes with this page is to share how co-parenting can work and how it doesn’t. And how you can find happiness after a failed relationship. I am not an expert on the situation and everyone’s circumstances will vary. And while I may not be my former spouse’s favorite person, I am successfully co-parenting and our children are functional happy little people.
Doug and I are constantly trying new things and soon we will embark on one more. We would also love to hear how your blended family works, so free feel to share with us.
Last year we celebrated Coach’s Day, a day that honored my now husband for consistently being there for my children. We respect court orders and knew the kids would not be here on Father’s Day. This year their dad opted to request his days beginning the day school let out. Actually, he was late in giving me the days by over a month, but was welcome to negotiating. So for now we have postponed until the kids come back. Which is ok.
We’d signed the kids up for basketball in April, and their season started in June. We have coordinated games and practices since they sometimes overlap, because in the end it’s about the kids. I share practice and game times, but for the most part this is the norm. Why would I purposefully keep their father out of their lives? I am neither a bitter nor spiteful ex-wife.
This Father’s Day, only of our kids is home because her dad works and his wife considers watching his daughter as “doing me a favor”. This is the equivalent to those people who list their kids as a hobby. But that’s a story for another day.
Today’s post is to acknowledge that once again my husband was at an empty house, where his child was not made available to him. It’s a shame that some people have no sense of regard or respect for what the law has outlined. It should be a father’s right to be allowed to parent and that child should be exposed to love, not hateful ramblings.
But alas this is not something new, he is never informed of anything in regards to his son. He is not privy to information regarding- games, achievements, personal successes, until after the fact. If he’s lucky. His hopes are that one day his son will know and understand that he tried.
So to all women, children are not pawns, they are kids that are entitled to be with their other parent as well. You shouldn’t get to decide when to make them available- but the fact that you do shows a reflection of the kind of person you truly are.
My kids are with their dad as outlined in the court order-because the kind of person I am is the kind that wants healthy loving children.